Feeling super down at this very moment in time. I have no exact idea why.
Had a major breakdown last night for almost 2 hours....I couldn't stop myself from crying......was hyperventilating...and I couldn't get out of the foetal position......was totally uptight.....
I dunno wat's the reason for my breakdown. I dunno wat is it's major cause...
All I know is that I'm feeling very very stretched right now......I'm feeling very lost....Like I don't know what's the next step to take. There seems to be so much to do, and really so little time.....
I feel like I'm in a room that seems so big, so big that it's endless, and I'm trying to find my way out.....yet, although the room is big, it seems that there are invisible walls everywhere, and that everywhere I turn, I'll bump into an invisible barrier, which stops me from going further, and at the end of it, I realise that though I can look so so far out, I can only stay within this small little space......
Usually I'll be fine after a breakdown...but even now, my tears are still uncontrollable.....and I really don't know what i'm doing or why I'm like that...I feel like I'm going crazy....I'm scaring myself so badly......
What scares me more is that Darling tells me that this breakdown of mine has become more common since I joined the teaching force......Am i really too stressed out? Is this path of career truly for me? Is that why God does not want me to receive the admission letter for NIE? What is going on with me?
help.........
3:16 PM
Life is Beautiful
I love you not only for what you are
but for what you make of me.